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Those who have known or seen me in the last few years must remember that my sight was poor and that I had to keep two pairs of glasses at hand, or on a string round my neck. In fact at the last World Congress, in Spokane, I had a problem to see anything at all. It was not easy to handle, especially being a painter where one's sight is the channel through which information goes in and out of the brain before going to the canvas…

In the last year those Subud members I met, were surprised to see me without my glasses and asked me if I had had an operation. How was it that I was not wearing glasses any more? So here is the story of how I discovered that my brain has the capacity to correct and stimulate my eyes so that my vision could improve.

When I was young I had perfect vision and as life became full of more and more responsibilities, I worked harder and started to stress. By the age of 40 I wore glasses to drive, by 50 I needed them to read as well. This did not bother me; as long as I wore the glasses, I could see perfectly.

At 59 my vision deteriorated rapidly. Many floaters came across my field of vision and straight lines started to curve. Lamp posts instead of being straight now looked crooked and reading became difficult even with glasses.

In the autumn of 1996, I went to Paris to see a top eye surgeon. After several hours of numerous tests he came to the conclusion that a membrane was growing over the retina of my right eye, making me see as if looking through ripples. At the time, he did not see that actually the same thing was happening to the left eye. He said there was nothing he could do for the floaters (the floaters disturb my vision so much it's like looking through a murky jelly with many bits in it!) As for the membrane, although it was a difficult operation, he would have to operate and remove it or within a year the eye would be blind. And that even after the first surgery, within 12 months, a cataract was likely to develop, for which I would have to undergo a second operation. His diagnosis failed to inspire much confidence especially as my right eye was actually the better of the two - the left having much astigmatism. So I asked him what was the percentage of success with this kind of operation? His answer was 80%. My immediate reply was what happens to the remaining 20%? His answer, 'Usually you lose the sight in that eye,' adding, rather unconvincingly, that as I would lose it anyway, it was worth the risk.

I said I would think about it and left the hospital feeling very unhappy.

A year later, my vision had deteriorated so much that I could not read except with a great deal of concentration, I could only drive when the light was very good, and painting was demanding more and more effort. I felt as if I were grinding to a halt.

On my sixtieth birthday, the seventh of December 1997, my caring sister Lydia sent me a book called Self Healing, My Life and Vision by Meir Schneider, an alternative therapist based in San Fransisco who cured himself of congenital cataracts, glaucoma and nystagmus and now teaches his method worldwide. I was unable to read it myself but my wife Mélinda read it to me in her loving and lovely voice. After a few chapters I was convinced Meir could help me.

As luck would have it, in February 1998 Meir happened to be running a training course in England and was looking for 'guinea pigs' for his trainees to work on. There were people flying in from all over the world to be worked on and I was delighted there was room for me.

Meir was born with congenital cataracts. His family moved from Kiev to Tel Aviv where he was able to receive the best medical care available. But by the age of six, after five unsuccessful operations, he was declared 100% blind and was given a white stick, a blind certificate and sent to a school for the visually handicapped to learn Braille.

But the story did not end there. Meir's parents are both deaf, and as much as Meir loved them, he found it impossible to accept that he too would be handicapped for life. He was determined that he should live as normal a life as possible and that one day he would see. When he was 17, a friend, two years younger than himself, discovered a book on the Bates Method. Dr William Bates was an American opthalmologist who developed a system of eye exercises based on his own scientific experiments and Tibetan yoga. His friend had improved his own sight and taught them to Meir. Against the advice of his family and doctors and with no positive encouragement, Meir worked diligently and religiously on his eyes and body for 18 months before he began to see positive change: four years later he had real results. He now drives, reads, works without glasses and has learnt so much about the self-healing processes of the body that he lectures, teaches and helps thousands of people overcome and improve a whole range of conditions.

So, I arrived in England to attend the training along with five others with eye problems. About 20 students, many already in the medical profession, would work on us under Meir's guidance.

We all sat together in a large room and each in turn talked about our problem; as it happened each case was very different. Meir instructed the students who were to work with me. I received three sessions of eye exercises and massage for one and a half hours each. Meir sees the body and the eyes as intimately connected and maintains that in order for the eyes to heal, respiration, circulation and relaxation need to be maximised. On the second day, after doing one exercise to help peripheral vision, I was given several paragraphs of different sized print to read. Automatically I went for the largest letters, which I could read without a problem. To my amazement, I was able to read with crystal clarity the tiniest type at the bottom right of the page - equivalent to the smallest size on a tiny medicine bottle. I could only read it for a few instants but I was stunned! How was it possible that with such damaged eyes I could see such small print? This was exciting as well as disturbing. Was I fooling myself in the first place? Despite my doubts I was fuelled with enough encouragement and drive to continue the exercises religiously. Incidentally, I can still now read the smallest type without glasses.

Meir advised me to visit him in San Francisco for a further 15 intensive sessions to maximise the results. He maintained his exercises would not remove the growths on my retinas but would revitalise the eye, train the brain to correct the distorted vision and develop the peripheral vision.

They gave me some basic exercises to keep me going until I saw the 'boss' again in the summer. Within three months my sight began to improve. I tried not to wear my glasses all the time and stopped wearing sunglasses.

Six months later I was in San Francisco at the Centre for Self Healing and started right away with Meir. At that first session he tested my eyes, massaged me to feel where the tension in my body was and decided what course we should take to improve my vision. Every day I worked with him, or his wife, Dror, accompanied by one or two students.

One day I was driving to the centre without my glasses when I noticed to my delight that I could read the car number plates well ahead of me - something was changing in my vision.

It would make this article too long to describe all that I experienced and the exercises I learned in that two weeks. Briefly, there are three main approaches in his work.

- Relaxation and stimulation through massage, palming (the hands creating cups over the eyes to keep them in total darkness) and movements.

- Visualising with the eyes closed, thinking black in the mind to relax the optic nerve, visualising an eye movement and then actually doing it (for me to visualise that a certain lamp post is straight in my mind and then seeing it straight for a few instants).

- The exercises, adapted to each person's case.

My time was up, but I took the opportunity to visit my son Richard and his friend Emma in Los Angeles. It was wonderful to be with them as I don't see them so often. When they left me at the airport I realised that I had lost my glasses! The first time in my life! How strange… What was I to do when I could not see where to go. I looked up at the departure board, to my horror it was completely blurred. Suddenly remembering the techniques I'd just learnt I sat down to relax. I palmed for five minutes, blinked 20 times, breathed deeply and looked at the board again. To my amazement I could read it and found my way to the plane.

Now 14 months later I still do not wear glasses or sunglasses. I can see but my seeing is different from what it used to be. Somehow it's clearer and sharper, even though the problem with the retina remains and the floaters have changed in form but are still there.

In Provence the light is very bright and it used to make me squint and tense my face: I thought that I needed sunglasses. Well I now do not wear them and keep a perfectly relaxed face in strong light.

I do between one and two hours per day of eye exercises including one-hour palming.The well- intentioned doctor in Paris had, without knowing it, contributed to my sight deterioration by telling me that I would lose my sight; my brain had stopped wanting to see. I had lost the joy of seeing. My eyes were in a kind of unfocused situation and my spirit had stopped looking through my eyes. Meir has taught me to see again.

The very gifted Lesley Evans who has studied many years with Meir and has a practice in London had written a further article about this work in this issue of Resonance. I met Lesley when she was finishing her course in San Fransciso, since then she has been seeing patients in England and in France with much success.

I hope that my experience will be of some use to others who feel lost as to what to do about their vision.

Glossary -

For readers who are not familiar with Subud, the following Indonesian words are often used instead of English.

- Latihan Kejiwaan: the practice of the worship of God in Subud

- Jiwa: the soul

- Nafsu: the lower forces

- Testing: the practice of asking and receiving guidance in the latihan

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